There are over a dozen ways to stall the frosh, the details
of which are not revealed anywhere on the Legend of the Greasepole CD. Cryptic suggestions
for how the weapons might be used are found on the inside of the booklet that comes with
the CD. But you don't have the CD. And I don't have the
image. So, if you feel like a helping hand...
Here is a synopsis of the "tools" available for you at the
greasepit.
Pizza
You can wield pizza in
the game by grabbing it from the delivery guy who pops up at the front of the screen. This
staple food of University students everywhere also doubles as a pit-side tool. Toss it
sidearm into the pit by clicking the left mouse button. It’s not a very effective
"weapon," but a hungry frosh that catches the pizza may stop to eat it. Hurling
it in the water is more strategic – frosh who have high hunger drives may come
running for the slice.
Eating
pizza stalls a frosh, but also sates their hunger and increases their strength.
Apples
Two crowd members
occasionally offer you a basket of apples during the game. You can click the left mouse
button to throw, or click and hold the left mouse button to wind up a stronger
shot. Apples can also be tossed at the Crowd, the Engineering Society President, and just
about anywhere else you’d like to cause unrest. How do you like them apples?
Your ability to knock frosh down is a function of their strength. As
the game progresses, the frosh will become increasingly resilient. Eating pizza, for
example, increases their ability to withstand an apple toss. Being hit with an apple first
lowers a frosh’s strength, but then raises it above its original level. This is meant
to reflect an increased resolve to avoid being knocked down by another apple, as well as
an increased understanding of how to avoid being affected by an apple attack. Clearly the
apples are only a short-term solution, even when thrown after length wind-ups.
Clark Hall Pub Mug o' Grog
An inebriated member of
the crowd occasionally offers you a keg of beer that can be used to fill up your Clark
Hall Pub mug. It would be a shame for it to go to waste, so use the right mouse button to
drink from the elixir. If you're willing to click the left mouse button and part with some
of it, the allure and subsequent effects of 6.5% ethanol can be put to good use. As with
the pizza, a thirsty frosh may grab the beer and chug it. Tossing a mug of beer into the
water can result in a free-for-all in which the frosh go scrambling for the prize.
Drinking beer lowers the intelligence of a frosh, and sometimes has the
immediate effect of having them do something stupid (like jumping off the pyramid, or
stopping to sing). However, it has the effect of increasing their strength (perhaps their perceived
strength?) and also sating their desire for more beer.
Physics 114 Exam
Once ranked the third
most hideous piece of paper on the planet, Phys 114 exams should be handled with care. In
the game, some keener has brought his old exams to the pit and occasionally offers one to
you.
Click the right mouse button to check your examination paper over and
make sure there are no pages missing. (There are instructions for how to build a
"Spam Cannon" on the paper. A Spam Cannon is essentially a modified Potato Gun.)
Click the left mouse button to toss an exam at the frosh. The frosh will scatter in every
direction. Only a frosh with an extremely high intelligence level will not be
affected by the exam. The 114 Exam thus gives new meaning to the phrase "smart
bomb."
Tossing the 114 exam at the frosh can devastate their attempt to
form a pyramid, but it also increases their overall intelligence level quite a bit.
Perhaps they’re learning by osmosis.
Firehose
The CD booklet explains
that someone this year has a friend at the fire department. They’ve brought a fire
truck to the pit so that the Frecs can get the frosh hosed.
The firehose is in the game for "fun" more than anything
else. It sends the frosh flying, but like the apples, it ends up increasing their
strength. A meter at the top of the screen indicates how much longer the hose can run
before it runs out of water. Water drips out fairly quickly even if you’re not
actively spraying.
ArtScis (Arts and Science Students)
Arts and Science
Students: they’re cute, they're lovable, but they don't belong at a private
engineering event. If one shows up, give 'em a shove with the left mouse button.
Many of the frosh will stop what they’re doing to come and splash
the alien in the pit. The thrill of splashing ArtScis, however, tapers off fairly quickly
after the first splash attack or two.
Commies (Commerce Students)
Commerce Students: See
"ArtScis" above, but omit the "cute" and "lovable" bits.
What more can one say about Commies that won't end with a
million-dollar lawsuit? A click of the left mouse button is worth a thousand words.
Golden Words Blimp
The Golden Word blimp occasionally flies by and
launches a cartoon hippopotamus at the frosh to confuse them. Golden Words is the campus
engineering newspaper; the blimp is found on their masthead and the hippo is their mascot.
The hippo causes some unrest and marginally affects the intelligence
level of the frosh it touches. There’s no real way to "induce" a blimp
attack; it’s just a fun random event.
Iron Ring
Every graduate of a
Canadian engineering program wears an iron ring on the little finger of his or her working
hand. The ring itself symbolizes both the pride we have in our profession
and, at the same time, our humility. The rings were originally crafted
from the twisted iron that remained after the first bridge ever constructed in the
province of Quebec collapsed due to a design flaw. A subsequent inquiry revealed the flaw
to have resulted from an error in judgement made by the bridge's engineers.
In the Pole Game, you can earn the right to don your iron ring at the
greasepit. If you can keep the crowd, the Engineering Society President and Al "Pop
Boy" Burchell excited and happy, an Iron Ring Forge will swing on to the screen and
begin pressing your ring. After it has swung out three times, your ring is forged and you
can put it on by clicking the icon of a spinning ring with your left mouse button.
The ring’s effect in the game is both symbolic and humorous. It
temporarily turns the frosh into animals – sheep, and cows with the wings of eagles.
The sheep poke fun at the "brainwashing" that goes on during frosh Week, and the
tendency the frosh have to follow like sheep just about anything their Frecs do or say.
The cows with wings of eagles are a reference to a chant sung during orientation week,
which the author shall not be repeat here but is more than willing to sing upon request.
The equations that determine when the iron ring forge will swing out
are driven by a cumulative sum of the "excitement" that your actions produce
during the game. There are also 16 "special" actions that, when performed for
the first time, significantly reduce the amount of "excitement" required to
forge the ring. These include:
